In the Shadow of Freedom’ by Laxmi Dhaul provides a personal lens on her parents, deeply affected by both India’s anti-colonial movement and the turbulent politics of World War II. Laxmi mentioned her father Ayi Tendulkar’s first journey to England—a truly epic experience. The Congress Party gave him a 500-rupee loan, and there’s a letter he wrote to Nehru offering to repay it. They sent him by ship to England to take the Indian Civil Services (ICS) exam, and he was just a young boy from Goa who had only finished his 10th standard. He’d worked in Ahmedabad briefly but had no idea what life in Europe would be like. Fortunately, the ship crew, mostly Goans, helped him adjust to European customs. They taught him to eat with a fork and knife, to use a napkin, and even how to tie his shoelaces. He said they provided the foundation he needed to carry himself with confidence when he arrived in Europe. “I thought that was such a beautiful story—a reminder that we all help each other in unexpected ways”, Laxmi ponders.
In Berlin, Ayi became a well-known journalist and met Thea von Harbou, the renowned filmmaker and screenwriter of classic films like ‘Metropolis’ and M Thea, a former wife of the legendary director Fritz Lang, was his lover and mentor, helping Ayi navigate European society and supporting his efforts to create educational opportunities for Indian students in Germany. However, Hitler’s rise to power marked a turning point, forcing Ayi to return to India.
Back in India, Ayi soon found himself drawn into Mahatma Gandhi’s campaign of non-cooperation with British rule, resonating with the anti-colonial sentiments shared by Goa, which continued to struggle under Portuguese dominance. With Thea’s consent, Ayi married Indumati Gunaji, a Gandhian activist, who shared his vision of a free India. The couple remained apart for several years as a respect to their commitment to India’s freedom struggle—a separation that echoed the longing for freedom that pervaded the Indian psyche, including in Goa.
“My father started a nationalist newspaper that was vocal in its criticisms of British rule, which the British authorities didn’t appreciate. The newspaper didn’t run for very long because the war began, but it left a mark on those who read it. He was brilliant, speaking six languages with confidence and ease. He had this remarkable self-assurance, even in his youth, that allowed him to connect with influential figures like Nehru and Vallabhbhai Patel. Despite coming from a humble background, he depended solely on scholarships to advance his education, which shows the strength he must have had.” Laxmi mentioned.
“One of the precious keepsakes I have are letters exchanged between my parents and Gandhi, especially regarding their marriage. After my father was released from prison, he wanted to marry my mother. She had promised Gandhi that she wouldn’t marry him without his blessing. Gandhi finally gave his permission, on the condition that they wait five years, which coincided with the length of my father’s imprisonment during the war. When the time came, Gandhi officiated their wedding in the ashram, following the ashram’s rituals. Later, Gandhi gave them another condition—not to have children until after independence, a stance he held with other couples as well, including Jayaprakash Narayan and others.
My father wrote to Gandhi about the challenge of this promise, and in response, Gandhi expressed his own doubts about the future. One of his letters to my mother includes the line, “What will you do if we don’t get independence?” That sentiment shocked me; it’s hard to imagine our leaders having any doubts about achieving independence, but it also shows the fragility of those times.”Ayi’s story, as chronicled by his daughter Laxmi Tendulkar Dhaul in ‘In the Shadow of Freedom’, captures this complex tapestry of love, sacrifice, and activism across borders. Through letters, documents, and photographs, Laxmi unearths the layered histories of her parents, of Thea, and of the countries entangled in their lives—Germany under fascism and India, and by extension Goa, under colonial rule.
The book’s title aptly encapsulates the ongoing influence of this legacy.
Even in a liberated India, the shadows of colonialism, war, and political turbulence linger. Ayi and Indumati’s stories challenge contemporary readers to consider the true nature of freedom, which is as much about the liberation of the mind as it is about political sovereignty.
For Laxmi Dhaul, chronicling her parents’ lives was a way to preserve this heritage, to ensure that the lessons of history are not forgotten in a rapidly changing world.Indumati’s stories challenge contemporary readers to consider the true nature of freedom, which is as much about the liberation of the mind as it is about political sovereignty.
For Laxmi Dhaul, chronicling her parents’ lives was a way to preserve this heritage, to ensure that the lessons of history are not forgotten in a rapidly changing world. Their stories offer a blueprint for future generations to understand the nuanced paths that lead to freedom—paths that require resilience, moral integrity, and an unwavering commitment to justice.